my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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