duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize