Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
