I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
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