you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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