Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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