I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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