when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Randomize
