If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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