weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Randomize
