that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
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