Whatcha textin bout Willis?
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Randomize
