He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Randomize
