it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
