he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
