there's paper in my vomit.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
