what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Randomize
