He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
