First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Randomize
