I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
So apparently I’m into choking now
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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