why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
Randomize
