I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
