I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
