Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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