Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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