i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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