im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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