Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
It's official drugs can't kill me
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
