Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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