Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
