This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
