If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize