It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Yo dont text me then not text me
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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