Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
i will never coherently bang her
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
cat food counts as protein by the way
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Randomize
