8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
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