Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Randomize
