Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
There was a lot of him and a little penis
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize
