Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
