READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Pooping to opera.
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