his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I just found a bag of teeth...
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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