i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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