Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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