how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
