HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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