I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
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