Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Randomize
