Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
