im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
