it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
