I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Randomize
