I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
